This recipe has quickly become one of the most useful recipes in my arsenal, especially as a college student with a limited budget. It's super simple, but tastes like a piece of home when you're at school. And of course, it's vegan! No, these aren't the flax-seed or banana pancakes that I'm sure you think of when you hear 'vegan pancakes'. These aren't the healthiest, or the most nutritious, but they do taste like genuine 'non-vegan' pancakes. Even my little sister — who HATES vegan food — admits these pancakes are the best.
PREP TIME: 5 mins COOK TIME: 30 mins SERVES: 20 pancakes
INGREDIENTS
WHITE FLOUR (2 1/4 cups)
CORNSTARCH (3 tbsp)
BAKING POWDER (3 tbsp)
BAKING SODA (1/2 tsp)
SALT (pinch)
MAPLE SYRUP (6 tbsp)
APPLE CIDER VINEGAR (3 tsp)
ALMOND MILK (2 1/2 cups)
VEGETABLE OIL (6 tbsp)
* cinnamon to taste (~ 3/4 tsp) *
RECIPE
Start by mixing together all the dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl. Make sure there are no clumps and the mixture is even. Then add the wet ingredients and whisk the batter so that the consistency smooth. If the batter is not runny enough, like the picture shown above, add more almond milk.
To cook the pancakes I usually ladle out about 1/4 cup of batter onto a pan and let the bottom side cook for 30 seconds to a minute on low heat. I prefer to use a non-stick pan so that you do not have to grease the pan with oil after every pancake. Make sure to check the edges as the first side cooks. It will begin to rise when it is ready to be flipped. After flipping, allow about 30 seconds on the other side and then cook for 2 minutes on each side so the pancake is cooked through. If the pancakes are still soft in the center after cooking, add a 1/2 tsp of baking soda and a pinch of salt to the batter and whisk thoroughly. This will help the batter rise and let heat enter when cooking.
The pancakes should be a light golden brown when they are cooked. If not, add a bit more oil to the batter to help with browning. Personally I prefer mine a little crispy on the outside, so I cook them on medium heat for a few seconds.
Pile the pancakes high and serve with fresh fruit! Or a bit of vegan butter and syrup, my personal favorite. They can also be frozen and reheated for a quick breakfast or a sweet dessert.
SWEATER - FOREVER21
SHORTS - FOREVER21
JACKET - ZARA
TIGHTS - TARGET
BOOTIES - STEVE MADDEN
LIPSTICK - MAYBELLINE - CRAZY FOR COFFEE
I just came back from another meeting feeling empty and exhausted. Another day went by where I expended the little energy I had left to fight a losing battle. You ever walk into a meeting and you know nothing is going to be accomplished because everyone is just there for themselves? And as soon as you leave that room, all the agreements are forgotten and the bonds dissolved as the participants rush to disclose information to 'their people'.
We were all friends to begin with. Close friends with a common 'enemy' per say, that united us like none other. We spent countless hours together without a thought that this would end. I don't think anyone thought that they weren't safe, or maybe that was just me being naive. But then everything changed... and should I have seen it coming? Probably.
We were all friends to begin with. Close friends with a common 'enemy' per say, that united us like none other. We spent countless hours together without a thought that this would end. I don't think anyone thought that they weren't safe, or maybe that was just me being naive. But then everything changed... and should I have seen it coming? Probably.
People are just so intent on always knowing things. And believe me, I'm like that too. A desire to be in control? Check. After all, knowledge is power and more knowledge means more power. But at school it goes beyond checking in on your BFF to see how her day was. It's not just checking in anymore, it's trying to get precious details about her relationship with a new guy. Those details add to their relationship's value. But as soon as the relationship doesn't seem like a profitable investment, those secrets aren't safe anymore and could be sold in a heartbeat. It's a power competition. A great stock exchange mediated by the most two faced brokers that buy and sell friendships like stock, in exchange for secrets and scandals that add to your profit and increase your buying power.
Friendship in college is sometimes, often times rather, a stock exchange of friendships. It's people competing to buy and sell each other depending on their worth and always for personal gain. Who can become the biggest shareholder of the most popular, and sought-after, stock. Friendships are bought and sold with eyes on the prize — personal gain and the most valuable portfolio filled with assets. No one is safe.
It's such as shame really because this isn't what college friendships are always like. There are some really amazing ones that make you feel like you've found your second family. There is no need for excessive display 'enjoyment' on Snapchat because you're already content with your people. You don't need to prove anything to anyone else. There is no fear that you might lose your investment. The relationship is safe, tucked away in your savings, never to be sold. There's trust and care and people actually put others before themselves. Secrets are safe and relationship shareholders are equal.
But then there's the other side — the 'watch your back' side. Or maybe the 'you should've watched your back side but now it's too late' side. The friendships that die out quick, that are short lived. They're like a sparkler that burns bright for a little while but is put out in seconds as soon as a shareholder thinks it's too much of a risky investment. Or maybe that it costs too much. Or maybe they rather invest elsewhere, in a more valuable relationship.
I say all this because this is the reality of life, not just college. Frankly I thought fake friends and selfish relationships were a thing of high school. I know that people come in and out of our lives naturally, unoffensively (is that a word?) — it's a fact that needs to be accepted, but it's also something that I struggle with. I am writing about this now because I think maybe I should've been more guarded. Maybe I should've watched my back. And this is hard for me because I can be a very opinionated person (I'm working on this). I don't get close to people easily, so when I do the walls just come crashing down and I trust before I fall and leap before I look.
No — this isn't just a salty rant. I have a feeling most of my personal blog posts are going to start out like this... but there's a point to all of them I promise! I guess I just wish I had been a little wiser before investing so much in others who had no intention of holding onto our relationship. There is SO MUCH pressure, especially on college girls, to find their 'soulmates' in Freshman year and have it all figured out. No I'm not talking about their romantic partner. I mean their group, their people, their girl-gang. Why do so many girls (and others, just speaking from my experience here) seek out a sorority within the first two years of college? Part of it is because there is that underlying pressure to find a family to stand by your side for the next 4 or so years...
... and there's nothing wrong with that — except for when that pressure leads you to hold onto the wrong people, and give yourself up for them. It happens. It's happened to me, a few times. I'm so sentimental I can hardly throw away a concert ticket, how am I supposed to throw away a person!? But the thing is, it's not throwing away a person, it's recognizing that what's best for you isn't someone who takes advantage of you. It isn't someone who's phone is filled with screenshots of your secrets. It's not someone who treats you like a sidekick. It's not someone who's only there to feel like they're on top. And it's certainly not a group of girls that sell out each other for secrets like their time is running out. Leave that situation immediately.
Believe me, there are better people out there. I know how distancing yourself from toxic people can feel. It feels like it's your loss right? Crazy how we still feel like we're losing even though we know what we've been through to come to this decision... The secrets behind your back, the invitations without your name on them... Even when you're making the right decision for yourself, you pause and wonder "what if things change?" NAH B. Friends don't intentionally hurt each other. And good people don't need to feel the power high that toxic people get when they sell out their 'friends' for attention.
Friendship in college is sometimes, often times rather, a stock exchange of friendships. It's people competing to buy and sell each other depending on their worth and always for personal gain. Who can become the biggest shareholder of the most popular, and sought-after, stock. Friendships are bought and sold with eyes on the prize — personal gain and the most valuable portfolio filled with assets. No one is safe.
It's such as shame really because this isn't what college friendships are always like. There are some really amazing ones that make you feel like you've found your second family. There is no need for excessive display 'enjoyment' on Snapchat because you're already content with your people. You don't need to prove anything to anyone else. There is no fear that you might lose your investment. The relationship is safe, tucked away in your savings, never to be sold. There's trust and care and people actually put others before themselves. Secrets are safe and relationship shareholders are equal.
But then there's the other side — the 'watch your back' side. Or maybe the 'you should've watched your back side but now it's too late' side. The friendships that die out quick, that are short lived. They're like a sparkler that burns bright for a little while but is put out in seconds as soon as a shareholder thinks it's too much of a risky investment. Or maybe that it costs too much. Or maybe they rather invest elsewhere, in a more valuable relationship.
I say all this because this is the reality of life, not just college. Frankly I thought fake friends and selfish relationships were a thing of high school. I know that people come in and out of our lives naturally, unoffensively (is that a word?) — it's a fact that needs to be accepted, but it's also something that I struggle with. I am writing about this now because I think maybe I should've been more guarded. Maybe I should've watched my back. And this is hard for me because I can be a very opinionated person (I'm working on this). I don't get close to people easily, so when I do the walls just come crashing down and I trust before I fall and leap before I look.
No — this isn't just a salty rant. I have a feeling most of my personal blog posts are going to start out like this... but there's a point to all of them I promise! I guess I just wish I had been a little wiser before investing so much in others who had no intention of holding onto our relationship. There is SO MUCH pressure, especially on college girls, to find their 'soulmates' in Freshman year and have it all figured out. No I'm not talking about their romantic partner. I mean their group, their people, their girl-gang. Why do so many girls (and others, just speaking from my experience here) seek out a sorority within the first two years of college? Part of it is because there is that underlying pressure to find a family to stand by your side for the next 4 or so years...
... and there's nothing wrong with that — except for when that pressure leads you to hold onto the wrong people, and give yourself up for them. It happens. It's happened to me, a few times. I'm so sentimental I can hardly throw away a concert ticket, how am I supposed to throw away a person!? But the thing is, it's not throwing away a person, it's recognizing that what's best for you isn't someone who takes advantage of you. It isn't someone who's phone is filled with screenshots of your secrets. It's not someone who treats you like a sidekick. It's not someone who's only there to feel like they're on top. And it's certainly not a group of girls that sell out each other for secrets like their time is running out. Leave that situation immediately.
Believe me, there are better people out there. I know how distancing yourself from toxic people can feel. It feels like it's your loss right? Crazy how we still feel like we're losing even though we know what we've been through to come to this decision... The secrets behind your back, the invitations without your name on them... Even when you're making the right decision for yourself, you pause and wonder "what if things change?" NAH B. Friends don't intentionally hurt each other. And good people don't need to feel the power high that toxic people get when they sell out their 'friends' for attention.
As soon as I realized all this, I took myself out of the situation and felt free. I no longer felt like I was the problem, like I wasn't worth enough to keep around or keep in the loop. I am at peace with myself knowing I am enough for the true friends that value me for the person I am, not a stock. The thing about the stock market is, you don't have to participate in it. And you don't have to be a part of the Friendship Stock Exchange either. The sooner you free yourself from the toxic people that gamble your worth, the sooner you'll realize that your best bet is to take yourself out of the Exchange, before someone makes that decision for you.
TURTLENECK - FOREVER21
PANTS - ZARA
JACKET - ZARA
BOOTIES - NORDSTROM
LIQUID LIPSTICK - MAC - DANCE WITH ME
* sorry about the lack of photos - some days just aren't photogenic days lolz *
DADDY ISSUES: Why are we attracted to men just like our fathers?
By Unknown - December 04, 2018
Well, believe it or not, there's a lot more behind this than just the Electra complex.
A quick recount of our exes and the guys we've been with, might just show us some surprising similarities. But for some of us, meaning myself, maybe we had known all along...?
For those of us who don't have the best relationship with our father, our dream man is as polar opposite from him as can be. But somehow we always end up with some guy, tallying the similarities to our father, while we hope and pray that these things will change. But the reality is this: you can never count on anyone to change – only yourself.
Don't get me wrong – I love my Papa to the end, but we're just not compatible; so I've been determined not to end up with anyone remotely like him. So back to the question, why do I always find myself with a guy who I can't help but see resemblance to my father?
Yes, I actually did research to find the answer to this one, and it goes deeper than a Neo-Freudian theory or Greek mythology.
The Electra Complex, or Carl Jung's psychoanalytic theory that we know informally as being a "Daddy's Girl," proposes that daughters are in competition with their mothers for possession of their father. Ha...How is it that childhood sentiments turn so dark so easily? It's like unearthing the Brothers Grimm newest, never-before-seen, twisted tale: "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves:" A battle between step-mother and step-daughter to be the fairest of them all. Or maybe the Brothers knew of this theory all along!
The logic continues... Basically the early communication between father and daughter serves as an example for interaction with the opposite sex later in the daughter's life. As infants we develop an idea of what 'love' is based on the caregivers in our lives, and we seek out that type of 'love' in our future sexual partners. Even lesbian women find themselves attracted to women like their mothers, or adopted mothers. It's not a genetic phenomena, it's just imprinting. That sense of familiarity is what we crave and we go looking for in our partners. And that's exactly why we are stuck in this cycle of ending up with guys who share shocking similarities with our father's.
In my research I found a quote by Relationship Therapist Dr. Judith Wright that made everything clear to me:
"You're picking somebody who has the same issues [as your father] so that you can fix it and do a better job this time around."
That explains the nagging voice in my head telling me to wait until he changes. Or maybe that voice is in my heart..
Is that why I'm hopelessly attracted to emotionally unavailable guys with addictive personalities who need saving from themselves? Because my father was absent from my life in an emotional capacity and I'm desperately trying to find someone like him to change into the attentive 'father figure' I've always wanted?
That would explain nearly every single dysfunctional relationship and interaction with a guy I've ever had. And let's be honest, I'm sure a lot of us who knew we didn't want a man like our inattentive fathers kept that in the back of our minds while we silently scanned each potential bachelor for an ounce of similarity to prep ourselves for the work that needed to be done. But at the same time, I always say, if you go searching hard enough to find something, you're going to find it. And the same goes for subconsciously trying to prepare yourself for your greatest fear, an empty partner who prolongs the emptiness you've felt growing up. If you keep looking for the tiniest similarity, you're going to find it and you're going to sabotage yourself.
This is not to say ignore the obvious warning signs. If a relationship is not going to work, it will reveal that to you. There's only a certain amount of time you can go around in circles, without progress, trying to fix something, or someone, who doesn't want to be fixed.
But what about avoiding the problem from the beginning? How does one avoid the pull of the Electra Complex when half the time, we're not even aware that it's happening?
The first step to solving a problem is finding its source. Do you feel like you keep falling for the wrong guys? Or maybe, do you know your relationship isn't for you but you feel the need to stay in it? Do you keep thinking that 'this time he'll be different,' or 'he's capable of changing'? Perhaps the problem lies somewhere else and you think maybe this person will fix things. Think hard... really hard about your past relationships with the opposite sex. Obviously 'Daddy Issues' isn't the answer to every relationship problem, but it could be your answer.
So if any of this resonates with you, then what do you do next? Jump ship from your current relationship? Say goodbye to ever looking at another man in bed without seeing your father instead? Nah. This isn't one of those twisted fairytales.
Now that you've found the source of your problem, be completely honest with yourself and your partner. Talk to them AND yourself about where your impulses may be coming from. Think about how serious some of your desires to change this person may be, and consider if it's worth it in the long run. Don't let your insecurities from your childhood dictate your future. Unfortunately, you can't change the past, and turning an emotionally unavailable man into an open book won't turn back time and create the father-daughter bond you've always wanted. But thank goodness it won't, because every relationship we have is a new story that doesn't have to end up like our parent's marriage.
Clearly I am one of those people that always had this notion in the back of my mind, scanning possible bachelors and ending up in another dysfunctional relationship, thinking there is no way out of this cycle. But each relationship is a new story, and while I can see my partner as a different person from my father, I can't change things about them that inherently upset me. I can, however, change my habit of falling prey to my insecurities that whisper, 'stay, wait and see,' while I know all along I've been miserable. The true way to win is to listen to your gut a.k.a. that first thought you have when you react to being ignored yet again or feeling unloved, those are your true desires trying to break free from your Electra that ties you to the past.
A quick recount of our exes and the guys we've been with, might just show us some surprising similarities. But for some of us, meaning myself, maybe we had known all along...?
For those of us who don't have the best relationship with our father, our dream man is as polar opposite from him as can be. But somehow we always end up with some guy, tallying the similarities to our father, while we hope and pray that these things will change. But the reality is this: you can never count on anyone to change – only yourself.
Don't get me wrong – I love my Papa to the end, but we're just not compatible; so I've been determined not to end up with anyone remotely like him. So back to the question, why do I always find myself with a guy who I can't help but see resemblance to my father?
Yes, I actually did research to find the answer to this one, and it goes deeper than a Neo-Freudian theory or Greek mythology.
The Electra Complex, or Carl Jung's psychoanalytic theory that we know informally as being a "Daddy's Girl," proposes that daughters are in competition with their mothers for possession of their father. Ha...How is it that childhood sentiments turn so dark so easily? It's like unearthing the Brothers Grimm newest, never-before-seen, twisted tale: "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves:" A battle between step-mother and step-daughter to be the fairest of them all. Or maybe the Brothers knew of this theory all along!
The logic continues... Basically the early communication between father and daughter serves as an example for interaction with the opposite sex later in the daughter's life. As infants we develop an idea of what 'love' is based on the caregivers in our lives, and we seek out that type of 'love' in our future sexual partners. Even lesbian women find themselves attracted to women like their mothers, or adopted mothers. It's not a genetic phenomena, it's just imprinting. That sense of familiarity is what we crave and we go looking for in our partners. And that's exactly why we are stuck in this cycle of ending up with guys who share shocking similarities with our father's.
In my research I found a quote by Relationship Therapist Dr. Judith Wright that made everything clear to me:
"You're picking somebody who has the same issues [as your father] so that you can fix it and do a better job this time around."
That explains the nagging voice in my head telling me to wait until he changes. Or maybe that voice is in my heart..
Is that why I'm hopelessly attracted to emotionally unavailable guys with addictive personalities who need saving from themselves? Because my father was absent from my life in an emotional capacity and I'm desperately trying to find someone like him to change into the attentive 'father figure' I've always wanted?
That would explain nearly every single dysfunctional relationship and interaction with a guy I've ever had. And let's be honest, I'm sure a lot of us who knew we didn't want a man like our inattentive fathers kept that in the back of our minds while we silently scanned each potential bachelor for an ounce of similarity to prep ourselves for the work that needed to be done. But at the same time, I always say, if you go searching hard enough to find something, you're going to find it. And the same goes for subconsciously trying to prepare yourself for your greatest fear, an empty partner who prolongs the emptiness you've felt growing up. If you keep looking for the tiniest similarity, you're going to find it and you're going to sabotage yourself.
This is not to say ignore the obvious warning signs. If a relationship is not going to work, it will reveal that to you. There's only a certain amount of time you can go around in circles, without progress, trying to fix something, or someone, who doesn't want to be fixed.
But what about avoiding the problem from the beginning? How does one avoid the pull of the Electra Complex when half the time, we're not even aware that it's happening?
The first step to solving a problem is finding its source. Do you feel like you keep falling for the wrong guys? Or maybe, do you know your relationship isn't for you but you feel the need to stay in it? Do you keep thinking that 'this time he'll be different,' or 'he's capable of changing'? Perhaps the problem lies somewhere else and you think maybe this person will fix things. Think hard... really hard about your past relationships with the opposite sex. Obviously 'Daddy Issues' isn't the answer to every relationship problem, but it could be your answer.
So if any of this resonates with you, then what do you do next? Jump ship from your current relationship? Say goodbye to ever looking at another man in bed without seeing your father instead? Nah. This isn't one of those twisted fairytales.
Now that you've found the source of your problem, be completely honest with yourself and your partner. Talk to them AND yourself about where your impulses may be coming from. Think about how serious some of your desires to change this person may be, and consider if it's worth it in the long run. Don't let your insecurities from your childhood dictate your future. Unfortunately, you can't change the past, and turning an emotionally unavailable man into an open book won't turn back time and create the father-daughter bond you've always wanted. But thank goodness it won't, because every relationship we have is a new story that doesn't have to end up like our parent's marriage.
Clearly I am one of those people that always had this notion in the back of my mind, scanning possible bachelors and ending up in another dysfunctional relationship, thinking there is no way out of this cycle. But each relationship is a new story, and while I can see my partner as a different person from my father, I can't change things about them that inherently upset me. I can, however, change my habit of falling prey to my insecurities that whisper, 'stay, wait and see,' while I know all along I've been miserable. The true way to win is to listen to your gut a.k.a. that first thought you have when you react to being ignored yet again or feeling unloved, those are your true desires trying to break free from your Electra that ties you to the past.
COAT - ZARA
TURTLENECK - FOREVER21
JEANS - URBAN OUTFITTERS
HEELS - TARGET
GLASSES - H&M
LIP LINER - RIMMEL - EPIC
JUMPSUIT - FOREVER21
JACKET - FOREVER21
HEELS - TARGET
